love and friendship quotes and sayings

An expert is a man who tells you a simple thing in a confused way in such a fashion as to make you think the confusion is your own fault. ~William Castle



One of the best things about marriage is that it gets young people to bed at a decent hour. ~M.M. Musselman



Thou hast added insult to injury. ~Phaedrus



I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry. ~Rita Rudner



Wisdom crieth without; she uttereth her voice in the streets: She crieth in the chief place of concourse, in the openings of the gates: in the city she uttereth her words, saying, How long, ye simple ones, will ye love simplicity? and the scorners delight in their scorning, and fools hate knowledge? ~Proverbs 1:20-22



If you wish to make an apple pie truly from scratch, you must first invent the universe. ~Carl Sagan



Perhaps the best Yuletide decoration is being wreathed in smiles. ~Author Unknown



I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced. ~Attributed to both Miller Barber and Lee Trevino



Promises and pie crusts are made to be broken. ~Jonathan Swift



A three-year-old gave this reaction to her Christmas dinner: "I don't like the turkey, but I like the bread he ate." ~Author Unknown



When the wine is in, the wit is out. ~Proverb



She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say "when." ~P.G. Wodehouse



Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft... and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor. ~Werner von Braun



Your families are extremely proud of you. You can't imagine the sense of relief they are experiencing. This would be a most opportune time to ask for money. ~Gary Bolding



We need a type of patriotism that recognizes the virtues of those who are opposed to us..... The old "manifest destiny" idea ought to be modified so that each nation has the manifest destiny to do the best it can - and that without cant, without the assumption of self-righteousness and with a desire to learn to the uttermost from other nations. ~Francis John McConnell



Know thyself! A maxim as pernicious as it is ugly. Whoever observes himself arrests his own development. A caterpillar who wanted to know itself well would never become a butterfly. ~Andre Gide



When a historian enters into metaphysics he has gone to a far country from whose bourne he will never return a historian. ~Shailer Mathews, The Spiritual Interpretation of History



The family. We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together. ~Erma Bombeck



Between a quarter and a third of Los Angeles's land area is now monopolized by the automobile and its needs - by freeways, highways, garages, gas stations, car lots, parking lots. And all of it is blanketed with anonymity and foul air. ~Alistair Cooke



You have come into a hard world. I know of only one easy place in it, and that is the grave. ~Henry Ward Beecher